境·Realm
Realm is a craftsbook made with watercolor on bristol and mixed media.
For Blessed/Blursed/Cursed & Paper Art @NYU ITP/IMACheck out the video
我好像找到了那个属于我的领地，这是一个像铁锁一样锁住我的世界。
属于我的失落，抑郁，病症，都在这个世界里一一展现在我的面前。
我无法抑制住我自己，我好像疯了，但是只有在这里我才安全。
只有在这个锁住我，凌虐我的世界里我才能找回属于我的空间。
我知道我生病了，我渐渐的在这里迷失我自己。
但是我无法离开，这里令人上瘾，而我已经不清醒了。
我给我自己建了一座巨大的监狱，但我是被我自己锁住的罪犯。
————
今天我突然醒来，这个世界变成了我从来没见过的样子，我的监狱呢？
身边的一切都变成了我从来没见过的怪物模样。而这个世界就只剩我一个人。
我一个人走在宽阔的马路上，天空格外的蓝，蓝的发紫。
没有太阳的身影，但是为什么这么亮。这些变得又丑又黏糊的怪物似乎不想伤害我，他们好像都是从一些什么物品变的，但是我认不清了。
好像变成这样也不错，和之前那个只有黑白灰的铁笼对比让我心情好多了。
我随意的躺在一片草地上，天好像看到了我，我感觉天离我越来越近，越来越近。
天压在我的鼻子上了，我抬手碰了碰天，天像一坨布丁一样抓住了我的手。
我用另一只手扶起身，我整个人都被天吃了。
————
在天里，我做了一个梦
我梦见我死了。
在一个展览柜里，死了无数次。
好像是溺死的，
窒息死的，
热死的，
冷死的。
被蚂蚁咬死的…
他们都在玩手机
不理我
我一直在喊 救命 救命…
我退去身上所有的衣服，赤裸地爬出展柜。
我把他们全杀了。
然后把他们的尸体陈列在为献祭我而建造的展馆里
看着他们
————
我惊醒在我的梦境里。
四周漂浮着我的梦想，欲望，厌恶，和压在我面具之下的罪恶。
我低头看了看我自己，我赤裸着身子。
我的双手变得透明。
渐渐的，我的脖子，胸膛，肚子，大腿，双脚，都慢慢变得透明。
我变成一只展翅的鹰，飞在这个光怪陆离的境。
属于我的境。
I think I found my realm that I was looking for.
Is a world of chains, locked me up here.
I am down, depressed, mentally ill.
But I enjoy my time in it, that’s the only place I feel safe and protected.
I know I’m harmed and unhealthy.
I am slowly deteriorated within every single minute in this space.
But it is addictive, and I’m overdose.
This is my panopticon, but I’m the criminal.
————
I woke up this morning and found myself in a place I’ve never been.
Where is my cage? My bed? My Panopticon?
Everything around me turned into monsters I’ve never seen before.
I’m the only one walking down the road.
The sky above my head is so blue, too blue almost become violet. There is no sun, but so bright.
All these monsters didn’t wanted to hurt me, they all seemed noticeable but I could not recall.
But this world isn’t bad compare to the one before.
I found a piece of grass and laid down.
The sky saw me, I could feel it is coming towards me.
When sky is above my nose, I touched it.
The sky was like a piece of pudding. I sit up, and the sky ate me.
I had a dream in the sky.
I died 100 times in a transparent display cage.
Dead from drowing, from choking, from murder, from coldness, and ants bit me to death.
I kept screaming, “help”, “help”.
No one responded.
So I took off my clothes and climed out from the cage.
And killed them all.
I displayed their bodies in the museum that was built for my sacrifice, and staring at them.
I woke up in another dream.
All around me floated my dreams, disgusts, desires, and sins that are pressed under my mask.
I looked at myself, naked.
My neck, chest, stomach, thighs, feet and hands are slowly becoming transparent.
I became an eagle with wings spread, flying in this spectacular realm.
My realm.
Is a world of chains, locked me up here.
I am down, depressed, mentally ill.
But I enjoy my time in it, that’s the only place I feel safe and protected.
I know I’m harmed and unhealthy.
I am slowly deteriorated within every single minute in this space.
But it is addictive, and I’m overdose.
This is my panopticon, but I’m the criminal.
————
I woke up this morning and found myself in a place I’ve never been.
Where is my cage? My bed? My Panopticon?
Everything around me turned into monsters I’ve never seen before.
I’m the only one walking down the road.
The sky above my head is so blue, too blue almost become violet. There is no sun, but so bright.
All these monsters didn’t wanted to hurt me, they all seemed noticeable but I could not recall.
But this world isn’t bad compare to the one before.
I found a piece of grass and laid down.
The sky saw me, I could feel it is coming towards me.
When sky is above my nose, I touched it.
The sky was like a piece of pudding. I sit up, and the sky ate me.
I had a dream in the sky.
I died 100 times in a transparent display cage.
Dead from drowing, from choking, from murder, from coldness, and ants bit me to death.
I kept screaming, “help”, “help”.
No one responded.
So I took off my clothes and climed out from the cage.
And killed them all.
I displayed their bodies in the museum that was built for my sacrifice, and staring at them.
I woke up in another dream.
All around me floated my dreams, disgusts, desires, and sins that are pressed under my mask.
I looked at myself, naked.
My neck, chest, stomach, thighs, feet and hands are slowly becoming transparent.
I became an eagle with wings spread, flying in this spectacular realm.
My realm.